Review

Review Date: 2-May-04
Spoiler Rating: Low
Juju Judgment: Junk

Laws of Attraction (2004)

NEW TO TOWN

SWM, 40s, NS, occasional bouts of drunkenness, seeks HWP SWF for long-term professional antagonism, inarticulate banter, and juvenile houseplaying. ME: divorce attorney, fit, blue/black (touch of manly gray), combines disheveled Soho charm with predatory Madison Ave smarm. Interests include baking brownies, cutesy Irish stereotypes, and unwarranted romantic declarations (will provide own soundtrack). YOU: neurotic divorce attorney, fear of intimacy, overbearing mother issues, compulsive junk food habit, trim, really just needs man to put ring on her finger. Red hair a plus. Let's find happiness through alcohol-fueled sex, ceili dancing, and sham nuptials! Discuss? Coffee? Dinner? Court date for low-IQ rock star and his crack-whore wife? Call box 8642B today.

EPHESIANS 5:22

REWARD: Lost creative dignity. Last seen in old, battered plot titled "Laws of Attraction," embossed initials "BS." Please call Aline Brosh McKenna and Robert Harling, screenwriters. 555-3621.

Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.
-- Mark Twain

Copyright © 2004 The Jujube (M. I. Kim). All rights reserved.